Wednesday, December 17, 2008

I don't change.  I've tried.  My eating habits.  My exercise habits.  Laziness.  Procrastination.  Being content with things I probably shouldn't be.  Doing just enough.  The part that gets to me, that really, really gets me is that I know better.  I know my life could be better if I were more proactive.  If I sought out my interests with more enthusiasm.  That I'd feel better if I was more picky about what I ate and in what quantity.  That I'd sleep better, feel better, think better and have more energy if I exercised on a regular basis.  That I'd be more motivated if I didn't drink so much.  I can see the relationships between all the small things that would improve my overall health and wellness but I can't seem to make them function all at the same time or for longer than a few weeks at a time.  
Now is the time of new years resolutions and I can honestly say that this is the first year that I'm actually scared to make one.  I feel like every time I make a resolution, weather it's for a new year or just a few pounds and I fail I feel it chip away at my character.  

I have much more to write on this subject as it has been weighing on me heavily for the past couple of years but I must get back to work.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think you should definitly cut down on the booze since you know how it affects you. Just try it. You don't have to give it up, but stop getting so drunk every weekend as that can lead to being an alcoholic before you know it. Just some logical advice from Mombo who is the smartest person you will ever know!!!!!

Dimitri said...

I knew it was you.